You know what the worst part about this coming up week is? It’s that after this weekend, the football season will already be a quarter freaking over. That’s what. I’m already thinking about the stupid bastard off-season. Sure NFL Europe is a nice distraction, but that’s only for 6 weeks. What then after that? I’ll tell you what, downloading every bit of porn ever created.
Anyway, on to the preview for Week 3.
Wow, there are so many awesome games on tap this week, I think this one might have to be a 3 or 4 parter.
#11 Michigan vs. #2 Notre Dame
- 3:30 PM ET NBC (NotreDame Blowjob Channel)
This is a game that will more than likely determine
the winner of the Big Ten well, nothing really. Because Notre Dame likes to be selfish (he’s the kid that kept the entire bucket of legos to himself, even though he only played with like 2 of them), there is almost no consequence to this game. Sure, people will say that it will go a long way to determining who has the inside track to being in the top 10 and in a BCS bowl by the end of the year, but no one really gives a crap.
I’m not sure who gets the nod here. Based on the cheerleaders, I might have to give the nod to Michigan.
Another important consideration in our
super scientificcompletely made up football previews are the notable alumni. Let’s take a look:
Um, cheer squad or math team on halloween? Plus that chick in the middle has a beard.
Ok, it’s the dance team, but still…
Well, Notre Dame enters the fight with a single representative. They believe this alum to be of such high caliber that no other is needed. This alum? Why, George Wendt of Cheers Fame of course. Wait, he didn’t even graduate? I wonder… why…..
Mmmm, class, I mean, beer, I mean, class.
Michigan has had it’s fair share of famous alum: Heisman Trophy
stealer winner Charles Woodson, Madonna (even though she didn’t graduate, due no doubt, to Michigan’s super high academic standards), and James Earl Jones.
Notre Dame, I hope you don’t…. CHOKE…
If that list hasn’t convinced you yet, well, you’d better at least act like it. Either that or you’d better act like you at least hate technology because mr. Ted Kaczynski a.k.a. the Unabomber, is also a proud graduate of the Maize and Bleu. (That’s how they spell the “blue” part now)
Now, this analysis has gone pretty long, so I’ll just suffice it to say, if Michigan doesn’t seem superior by now, I present you with “indisputable video evidence” of not exactly Michigan’s superiority, but rather Notre Dame’s well… um… just watch.
Part 2 coming up…
Email this Post