So the offseason is going along at full tilt this summer, but it doesn’t seem as bad as last summer. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that there will be at least a 2 week distraction in the form of the Olympics taking place in Red China.

For those of you who don’t know, the Olympics are a multinational, multi-sport event which brings together people from many different cultures in a cocoon of understanding and tolerance under the flag of sport. That overly sappy viewpoint aside, the Olympics lack one thing: football. Yeah, they have futbol, you know, the one with the feet, but they don’t have real, sweaty, fat, brutal, non-foot-using, football.

Of course, most countries have no idea what football is, and even those that do, generally couldn’t compete honestly with the US or Canada. That being said, there’s something like 119 Division 1A schools, so I think teams could represent other countries by relevance.

What do I mean by relevance? Well, let’s take some of our favorite teams and assign them to some countries.

England - A country with countless amounts of tradition and history although they had previously enjoyed untold amounts of success, have fallen on hard times a little bit.
To be represented by: Michigan

Germany – An interesting history, along with a time in which the whole world feared them, but which was relatively short-lived in the annals of history, only to once again fall into the trap of the status quo.
To be represented by: Tennessee

China – Once considered to be exotic and mystical, and now the toast of the town for reasons unknown to most, but nonetheless yielding power that seems real enough.
To be represented by: LSU

Japan - A long standing empire who is perhaps too proud for it’s own good. Able to build up a reputation for quality amidst weak competition particularly in several industries.
To be represented by: Southern Cal

France – A once-proud nation with a single harsh dictator in Napoleon, who was able to cultivate the reputation of his country as a proud empire, only to now surrender at the slightest hint of a battle.
To be represented by: Alabama

Of course, there are many more, but I think you get a good idea of what we’re getting at.  If you have any ideas, post them in the comments.