If you’re just joining us, we’ve been doing a run-down of all of the SEC teams. We’ve now alphabetically come to…
The Georgia Bulldogs
The Bulldogs are a perennial top 25 team and one of the three powerhouse programs in the SEC East. It almost goes without saying that any team able to emerge unscathed from the SEC deserves a shot at the national title (Auburn was screwed). UGA is always a contender at the national level and show no signs of being any less this coming year.
The mascot of the bulldogs is the…well, bulldog. The official team’s mascot is uncreatively named Uga, the current dog being Uga VI. Uga is the fattest mascot ever, hardly able to take 10 steps before collapsing from a pulmonary embolism. Uga V tragically died after trying to consume a Georgia cheerleader. He got only as far as the pom-pom before choking to death. An apparent Good Samaritan attempted CPR, but it was in fact just a drunk local attempting to hook up with the poor canine. It was reported that his sister was thrown into such a jealous rage he had to sleep outside for a week and wasn’t even allowed access to their outhouse. We’re not trying to imply that all Georgian’s are yokels…that just speaks for itself.
They’re stupid – They painted the G on upside down
Sanford Stadium is home to the UGA football team, seating 92,746 fans. After having been so proud of naming their dog Uga, they then stole the Green Bay Packer’s logo and painted on the field, continuing their trend of uncreative and unoriginal ideas to boost their program (many of which are Yale inspired…which is a bit like Jessica Simpson aspiring to think like Stephen Hawking). The stadium was named after the popular TV series, Sanford and Son.
Sanford and Son, enjoying the game from their club level seats
Georgia is steeped in traditions. If you’ve ever visited Sanford Stadium, you’ll know that it’s standard procedure to be extremely rude to the visiting team and their fans, doing things that include, but not limited to, throwing empty liquor bottles, raising the middle finger, and exposing their “honky tonk badunkadunks”.
Georgia also has a band that plays their fight song, “Georgia’s on my Mind”. Between the 3rd and 4th quarters, the band plays the theme song to Sanford and Son, with all alumni standing with a hand over their heart, pretending to have a heart attack.
On a side note, I really hate Georgia. Not necessarily the school so much as the whole state and everything that it encompasses. Except Stone Mountain, that place is really fun….what with the huge rock sculpture thing and the laser show. You just can’t beat a good laser show.
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