In Part One of our compelling series, we took at look at some of the questions raised by DJ Gallo regarding the unofficial fight song of the University of Tennessee. Now, we take a look at the second and final part of the unofficial Q&A session. Enjoy:

two strangers climbed ol’ Rocky Top
Lookin’ for a moonshine still;
Strangers ain’t come down from Rocky Top,
Reckon they never will.

(Soooooo … am I to gather that you kill federal officers who investigate illegal production of alcoholic beverages, and that you’re so blazed about it you see no problem singing it out to the world? I see. You Tennesseans have a bit of an anger problem, don’t you? Now I’m kind of wishing I hadn’t written this. Please don’t take my honest questions the wrong way. I don’t want any violence.)

**First off, the song doesn’t mention that anyone was a federal anything, but if one is to make inferences about the identity of the “strangers,” more than likely it was a couple people from up North looking to “git their shine on.” And you know what? It’s probably so freaking good that they decided to stay. The whole “killing” angle probably came from some of the jealous visitors who were denied the good “Mountain Dew” and decided to start a dirty rumor. Don’t believe me? Try going up there and seeing for yourself. I promise it’ll be safe… hehehe, I mean, no hehehe.**

Mountain Dew, now, 190 proof.

Corn won’t grow at all on Rocky Top,
Dirt’s too rocky by far;
That’s why all the folks on Rocky Top
Get their corn from a jar.

(Another moonshine reference. You like the drink, no? But for your own health, I must ask: You do realize corn ingested via moonshine does not count toward the recommended daily intake of vegetables, right? Same with fruit wine. It’s not the same as eating a piece of fruit.)

**Damn skippy we like it. And saying that moonshine doesn’t count towards our recommended daily intake of vegetables is just crazy talk. It’d be like ordering a “coke” and then the waitress not asking you “what kind.” MADNESS I say! Besides, something that’s made from something else is just as good, sometimes better than the original. Case-in-point: Chicken McNuggets. They start off as entrails, feet, beaks, eyeballs and buttholes, but turn into awesomeness. Eat that!**

(Chorus)

I’ve had years of cramped-up city life,
Trapped like a duck in a pen;
All I know is it’s a pity life
Can’t be simple again.

(Yes, it sure is a “pity life” living in a city, what with reasonable phone bills, no access to frisky bear-cats, laws against killing federal officers and a dearth of corn-based alcohol. I mean, who wouldn’t want to live on Rocky Top?)

**It’s not actually the city life that’s the bad part, and besides, I thought we already established that bear-cats can be hot. And once again, no federal officers were harmed in the making of this song, in fact, they’re happier now than they have ever been. Wooo!

(Chorus)

(One last time on the chorus … sing it loud and proud! That is, those of you who aren’t passed out drunk, arrested, or mauled by the killing machine you call your girlfriend.)

**