Well, with the holiday season and excessive laziness brought on by consumption of too many dead animals, the posts here have been few and far between.   That having been said, we haven’t forgotten about you, dear reader, and are working on trying to get new and exciting stories and features (probably not really) out to you soon.

We hope everyone has a happy holiday season, and we hope you didn’t get too drunk at the office Christmas Holiday Christmas party.  And if you did, we hope you didn’t make out with the moustache lady from shipping and receiving because you were too drunk to realize she wasn’t the boss’s fine ass secretary who you wouldn’t mind giving up half your stuff to “have a taste.”

Alright folks, the last one til the final:

Rank	Team	Delta
1	Florida	–
2	Oklahoma	–
3	Texas	–
4	Alabama	–
5	Southern Cal	–
6	Penn State	–
7	Texas Tech	–
8	Utah	–
9	Ohio State	–
10	Boise State	–
11	Oregon	–
12	TCU	–
13	Oklahoma State	–
14	Georgia Tech	–
15	Brigham Young	–
16	Cincinnati	–
17	Georgia	–
18	Michigan State	–
19	Boston College	–
20	Missouri	–
21	Mississippi	–
22	Northwestern	–
23	Pittsburgh	–
24	Oregon State	–
25	Ball State	–

So, the SEC Championship game came and went, and when the dust settled, the Florida Gators of um, Florida, won the SEC Championship leaving Alabama to lick their wounds after a stellar football regular season.

An interesting thing happened as I started watching the game.  i started feel respect for the two teams playing in the game.  Respect. For Florida.  And Alabama.  “What the hell is going on?” I asked myself, when it donned on me that this is probably how fans of teams like Kentucky, Vandy, Ole Miss, et.al. are used to feeling.  A feeling of “well, our team wasn’t even close to sniffing the poo coming out of the sewer of the Georgia Dome, so congrats to the teams that did make it.”  Needless to say, it was a terrible feeling.

There they were, the Florida Gators, with their shiny coach, and shiny helmets with a shiny quarterback in a shiny offense.  It was all so… Shiny.  But who could blame them?  They’re a pretty good team.  Ever since a sloppy loss to a terrible Ole Miss team, the Gators were able to get their act together and play inspired (albiet boring ass veer-pass-single wing-option) football.

Then there was Alabama, with their even shiner coach, but no-name, blue-collar defense and devastating running game.  As much as I hate to say it, that’s the kind of team that deserves respect, and being able to do it with no big names other than their turncoat of a head coach, I was almost rooting for them to win.  Almost.

In the end, it was still a meteor game where I was secretly hoping the Georgia Dome would be swallowed in a sinkhole the size of the coaches’ combined egos.  But at the end of the day, the Gators pulled it off, and well, I guess congratulations.

This is where my team affiliation ends and conference affiliation begins, so let’s make it 3 in a row for the SEC.  Go Gato… I can’t do it.

This season has been chock full of rumors going around about certain coaches being let go, other coaches being interviewed, and even others being hired seemingly before any “official statements” are ever issued.  These rumors are usually attributed to “inside” or “anonymous sources” which begs the question: who the hell are these inside sources, and can we get one?

Seriously.

Please?

All we want is to break a story, and not be given proper credit for it by the mainstream media.  What better than to break a story on a blog that no one takes seirously, only to have it come true, and not be acknowledged at all on ESPN?  I mean, ESPN.  That’s the big time!

If you have any juicy gossip, post it in the comments here, and you know, we’ll totally post all of it never post any of it.  It’ll be great.  You’ll get the same treatment from us, as we will from ESPN.  Just think about it, it’s like a dream come true for most of you.  Being ignored on a blog, that ESPN doesn’t care about!  Make it happen people!  Dreams can come true!  I should stop using exclaimation points!

FootVols!

So, Tommy Tuberville has stepped down as the head coach of the Auburn Tigers after losing the Iron Bowl this year.  Everyone assumed that Tuberville would get at least one more year to right the ship bringing in a new OC, and trying again.  This is the second coaching fatality due to ineffective offensive systems in their first year.  That being said, with the Clemson job being taken, it seems that a new job possibility has opened up for the Papa.

Our “sources” have revealed that Fulmer would take the job if offered.  And by “sources” we mean “voices in Jon’s head.”  So, if it happens, you heard it here first!  And not to mention that the voices in my head are quite the fortunetellers.

In other news, Alabama will win the SEC Championship game but lose in the National Title game.

Also, the hole in the ozone layer will make a comeback as it has felt that it has been ignored over the last decade or so.

FootVols!

We recently got a comment on a post, protesting our use of the word “FootVols”  as a violation of copyright and intellectual property laws.  See the comment and post here

First of all, who the hell is Terry Burnette and why is she such a stick in the mud?  Besides, the copyright Terry Burnette owns is for Foot(-)Vols with a football in the middle on a Tshirt.

Click here and search for “foot vols” minus the quotations.

Also, Terry Burnette owns the copyright to “Great Vols “A” Fire”  Get it right moron.  In fact, go ahead and give me the name of your attorney, and I will contact him, if only to ask if you’re this big of a douche in real life too.

Your statement is about as plausible as me saying: I hereby Trademark the name Terry Burnette(TM), so you should please contact my attorney before using the name in any capacity in the future.  Please cease and desist use of the name immediately or face legal action.

Seriously, is this what you do, is go around on the internet looking for blogs that use words that you have randomly copywritten 16 years ago to harass because you’re a crotchety old man?

Looking up copyright law, we are well aware that copyrighting does not protect “short phrases or slogans”.  Any lawyers out there that want to chime in on this are more than invited.  If in fact we are violating copyright law, then we will be glad to take down any mention of that word; at this point, however, we feel that our use of the word “FootVols” and your idea for a T-shirt do not constitute illegal infringement.

Also, we don’t respond kindly to threats, and you can contact whoever you want wherever you want, because honestly, you’re acting like a sad, sorry troll who fears things that he doesn’t understand.

You apparently love the law so much, how’s this one for size?  First Amendment, freedom of speech.  So, that being the case, would losers who dislike people using a word that resembles a copyright that they may or may not own, put on tshirts that aren’t even available anywhere, STFU and go away?  Thank you.

Oh, and Go FootVols!  FootVols are great!  FootVols!

Here it is: our ballot for the week!

Rank	Team	Delta
1	Alabama	–
2	Florida	–
3	Oklahoma	–
4	Texas	–
5	Southern Cal	–
6	Penn State	1
7	Texas Tech	1
8	Utah	–
9	Ohio State	–
10	Boise State	–
11	Oregon	6
12	TCU	8
13	Cincinnati	2
14	Ball State	–
15	Oklahoma State	4
16	Missouri	4
17	Georgia Tech	1
18	Boston College	1
19	Brigham Young	3
20	Georgia	7
21	Michigan State	–
22	Mississippi	4
23	Northwestern	2
24	Pittsburgh	2
25	Oregon State	9

Alabama and Florida remain at the top, with Oklahoma taking the third spot.  Texas did previously defeat the Sooners, but we feel that OK has done enough in the meantime to more than make up for it.  There’s no real changes at the top of the ballot due to the end of the regular season at many schools.

Anyway, if you see any terrible errors, let us know, we’ll take it into consideration for our final ballot on Wednesday.