So, the NFL, feeling the crunch of the offseason news-less football black hole, and posted a feature about Coaches’ wives being the real MVP’s or some kind of crappy statement like that. That got me to thinking, what’s the status of the wives in the SEC? Deep South Sports had a great feature about it a while ago, and so we thought we’d like to have our own look (East wives first, West later):
*Disclaimer: These pictures may or may not actually be the people that I claim them to be, and if they are not, don’t blame me, blame Google*
Shelley Meyer (Florida)
- This wife, brought to you by the Letter “E.” Lady’s sporting 4 of em in her name. I wouldn’t be surprised if her middle name was Stefene or maybe even Eeeee! Also, apparently the whole one arm extended thing runs in the family.
Katharyn Richt (Georgia)
- Katharyn, could you spell your name any more awkwardly? How about Kahthahrynne? But that aside, the good Mrs. Richt has lots of… teeth. I mean, seriously, you can see her wisdom teeth in that photo. Also, her wardrobe is a bit suspect, but jean jacket aside, I’ll be she cleans up real nice.
Karen Brooks (Kentucky)
- Now now, I know which joke you’re expecting me to make here, but give me some credit. I try to avoid the super obvious jokes so just know that there will be no mention of Rich Brooks’ wife looking like a horse. Besides, the horses didn’t do anything wrong to be lumped in with her! Zing!
Jerri Spurrier (South Carolina)
- Is it just me, or does the bill on that cap look exceptionally huge? This can mean one of two things: she’s wearing a super gigantic billed cap, or her head is super tiny. Frankly, I’m going with the second one due to her being married to Steve. Either her brain was always really small, or it started atrophying after living with the man.
Vicky Fulmer (Tennessee)
- Now, I might have tricked you on this one, because Mrs. Fulmer is actually the second one in the picture. The lady in the foreground is actualy Ms. Fulmer, the good coach’s daughter. Who would’ve thunk it? Vicky is looking a bit thin, but perhaps that’s because every time she’s done with loading the fridge, she turns around, and voila, it’s empty. Magic Fridge!
Catherine Johnson (Vanderbilt)
- If Bobby Johnson looks like Steve Martin, the Catherine Johnson looks like, um, not anyone particularly famous. I mean, have you seen a more plain looking couple? It’s perfect that they both live and work in Nashville, the world’s most beige city. I mean, one of Vandy’s school colors is even beige. Way to go Catherine, now go have you guys some super plain kids!
Of course, these ladies might possibly be the MVPs of their teams, but until I find more evidence to the contrary, I’m just going to assume that they’re wives just like any other wives, controlling their husbands lives, and turning an otherwise healthy, happy man into a shell of his former self. Part two coming up soon!
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